Conversations with my pregnant wife


#1

For those of you are planning on having children in your life, here is an example of some conversations you get to deal with.

Wife: Hun, I’m too sick to make food. Can you make me something?
Me: Sure, what do you want?
Wife: Anything. Whatever we have.
Me: I can make pasta. Or maybe a salad.
Wife: I need something with protein, otherwise I won’t last the night.
Me: checks around So, we really don’t have any chicken. We have beef, but nothing to put it in.
Wife: Well I have to have protein.
Me: Then go get some food from somewhere.
Wife: I don’t want to go out, it’s raining.
Me: Then I’ll get you something, what do you want.
Wife: No, I want you to stay here with me.
Me: …okay, then I’m staying here. What would you like me to make for dinner?
Wife: I dunno, something with prote- wait, didn’t we just talk about this?
Me: I dunno, did we?
Wife: I feel like we… no, I’m pretty sure I told you I wanted protein, pregnancy brain isn’t THAT bad.
Me: And I’m pretty sure I told you we don’t have anything.
Wife: Then we should go get something.
Me: …
Wife: …
Me: …
Wife: …
Me: …
Wife: …
Me: Where do you want to go?
Wife: What?
Me: For food.
Wife: Oh, I dunno. Should I bring Charles? (our 9 month old son)
Me: …what?
Wife: If we go, should I bring Charles with me in the car to help put him to sleep?
Me: …yes?
Wife: Why is that a question?
Me: Because if we BOTH go to get food, then why would we not also bring Charles?
Wife: No! I mean, if I go, I could put him in the car to… stops for a second Okay, pregnancy brain kicked in. Sorry.
Me: …
Wife: …
Me: …
Wife: …
Me: Baby?
Wife: Yes?
Me: Where. Do. You. Want…
Wife: I don’t know! walks off

So that just happened. Still figuring out where we’re going. I hope you’re all still looking forward to having kids!


#2

Tell us when you figure out where you’re going to go to get some protein


#3

idk why but this made me smile


#4

this is great. i guess i am staying single after all


#5

SLOWLY BUT SURELY, I’LL REVERSE THE ORDER OF THE SPAM CATEGORY.